SOULTales - Character Strengths, Stories & Vocabulary

Friday, October 29, 2010

In the Manner of Thinking...

Have you ever been there?

When your mind is in panic and your thoughts are washing over you in one negative wave after another, when it seems as if the world is suffocating you, when every breathe is like a coiled snake around your chest, and that very chest will burst, explode with grief and pain?

If you have, then I understand you and so read on...

If you have not, then to understand read on...

At these moments of pain and anger, or pain and despair, get out.

Go out of the house, put some distance between you and that which is causing this reaction in you.
and take yourself to a....bookshop...
Yes a bookshop...

Browse, look around, then pick up the first book that catches your attention, flip through it, stop at a page, read it...
In all probability you will find the answer you are looking for...


Try it.

This is not the first time I have done it...but I must confess this is the first time I have noticed how I reach to books for solace. I noticed how the answers we are looking for are within our sub conscious, and it is probably that which guides us to look for reassurances from the outside world.

By answers I don't mean solutions, not at all. Yet these lines and words that we do automatically reach out to, illuminate our path to understanding.

In all of this I feel as if there is a power beyond us, or is it within us(?), which is showing us...reflecting ourselves to us.

I don't remember the book I picked up, nor the author, but it told me that when expectations are not met, when we find that the other person is completely unmoved by your point of view, then replace the Anger that you feel with Dismay, and feel the changes that this thinking brings into your self, and how you handle the situation.

Anger and Dismay for me, are the flip side of the same coin.

With anger I react...many times irrationally, emotionally
but by changing it to dismay...I find the emotion is responsive and rational.

Why does the word make a difference?

Anger is telling you, You are right and they are Wrong, and the ego finds that processing this is hurtful , so reactive/ emotional.


Dismay is telling you You are right but they have not understood, and the ego finds ways and means to communicate this!

Simple?...Now Sceptical...?

Do try this with yourself and need to believe in this, as is true with any thing in life.
Also remember you need to go with a question...but believe me even without questions, many times the words that I pick out from a book seems to reflect my thoughts for that moment.

Changing the way we think after all is the most positive way to tackle situations, isn't it?

Since this post is very close to me, please do leave your thoughts....


  1. True..what u have experienced is real. All problems have solution and the solution is very much within us..we just need to be aware and take the cues that the universe gives us..

  2. YEs, simple words like in quotes leave a deep impression on us and turns us arround.

  3. A very interesting point of view, a very sensible one. Being someone who usually gives in to the passion of anger, I am slowly (and sometimes very painfully) learning to pick my battles. Those that I choose not to fight, I try to analyse ways to tackle without indulging in heated exchanges. I guess subconsciously I am learning what you are saying. I am no where near nirvana but good to know I am on the right path! Lovely post, as usual!

  4. aah. now that explains why we think so alike... i too reach for a book at such times and am not even aware of what i am reading... at times, i also begin to write, and after about an hour, realise that i have filled pages without even knowing what i was writing about :) at one time, i used to read what i had written later, but then that was more disturbing than anything, so i started tearing and flushing down the papers after i was done!