SOULTales - Character Strengths, Stories & Vocabulary

Monday, January 25, 2016

Merging Identities

I was driving down the other day, one of my usual and umpteenth trips to the Coaching centre in order to pick up my daughter, when I saw that girl. She was dressed in a men’s shirt and pant, short hair and shoes, the only way I could identify her gender was the slight effeminate nature of her stand. It got me wondering.

Gender and it’s use in today’s world of merging identities is a very deep and disturbing space. I know that gender was a need of evolution to identify and sort roles, to facilitate certain behaviours in order to ensure sustainability of the species.

But we no longer need such rigid lines. In fact rigidity is the reason why we are facing such excesses as gender bias and discrimination.
Our persona takes up the biological characteristics of the organs that we are born with that is all. But beyond that most of us are conditioned and taught to live in a particular way; to behave Male or to behave Female.

We further create divisiveness by inserting a third gender, and call them Transgender.

What is the point?

Are we not all transgender?

Think about it. There is greater and more evidence to show that all Human Beings irrespective of Gender have a male and female aspect to their personality. Call it Yin and Yang, or Anima and Animus, Purusha and Prakriti from Hindu myth.

In Hindu Mythology from time immemorial we have known the concept of Ardhanareeshwarer, the androgynous Lord and his consort who illustrate the inseperable male and female principle, who we worship in all its glory and piety as well. 

Whether the male absorbs the female or female absorbs the male, the fact and fundamental truth remains that we all have the potential to be one or the other and it is only a matter of choice.


What if in the future, there is no differentiation between male and female and we can choose who and what we want to be and do not force ourselves to adapt and live what our genetics shows the world?

No gender, only Transgender Male and Transgender Female; and that’s what all the innumerable forms we fill will ask us to tell. Then we are sorted in terms of the relationships we can choose to have; T.Male to T.Male, T.Female to T.Female, T.Male to T.Female and many more. There is no need for discrimination and fear of alternative relationships.

The more we divide and separate ourselves and the more differences we see, we only create an incoherent, violent society. We need to merge, see similarities and co-create a new vision for the future.

I hope we wake up to the reality of merging Identities. I hope we stop discrimination in any form. I hope love is the only language of communication.

Here is a link I found to Devdutt Patnaik's book on gender and various connotations in Hindu Mythology

There is a book too : The Man who was a Woman

Tuesday, January 19, 2016

Self Management is like Waste management

At the outset let me say that this metaphorical world I am going to lead you into may be a bit too much for you to handle, that’s alright and that is exactly what looking inwards is all about.

It is dirty and downright dangerous and meant for the brave and resourceful only!

So as I said, Self Management is like Waste management. You have to do it, you know it and many know it, but we (in India) put it off, till it has piled up so high we are in danger of sinking into our own muck.
You have to go inwards, understand yourself and where you are, at different points in life otherwise the sh** will pile up!
Having said that some would suggest that Inward journey is a matter of choice – (well we know what you did to all the muck that piled up, you shoved it under the carpet!)

Jokes apart...

In my mind this is part of life and living –to go inward, understand yourself and retain that which is useful and discard (mindfully) all that which is not. So now that you are willing to segregate and separate, you become aware of all the processes involved.

Reuse all that adds value to your life, the organic stuff that enables growth can be retained and composted! Rich black gold of learning from life is obtained from this accumulation.

Recycle by re-imagining all the stuff that cannot be used as is but has to be integrated creatively.

Reduce and discard all that is not needed, throw it away again mindfully. Not onto the streets for all to see, but with care and in meaningful ways give it away.

I would also add one more R to this, Replace. If you need to replace some of the old time worn stuff with new learnings, then do it.

Inward journey or Self-management also uses the 4 R principles!

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